(no subject)

[everymonstrousthing]

It's late. It's very, very late. And he has no idea what he's doing. He has no idea what he's doing.

He's not drunk - a little, maybe, but not enough to actually blame it. He's been at the club all day, finishing repairing the damage that he'd wrought with his cane. He'd thought about going home, but his apartment doesn't feel like home anymore, because home was on the tenth floor, with windows that opened onto the roof.

And what he is is lonely. And he's found something for that - not a cure. But a distraction.

And maybe it isn't fair. But what about life is?

He knocks on Jesper's door and then leans against the wall and waits.

Comments

[materialnik]

Jesper shifts under him, kissing Kaz's jaw and neck until his mouth is under his ear so he can whisper into it, trying to be seductive. "How do you want me this time? Any requests?"

[everymonstrousthing]

Kaz shakes his head. He's too overwhelmed by choices. Jesper can't expect him to choose.

"You're the one who's spent time thinking about this."

[materialnik]

"It's true," Jesper says, because why deny it? Kaz already knows Jesper's attraction goes way back so why not use all those fantasies to their advantage.

"You could ride me," he muses. "Or be had from behind, but that might be bad on your leg."

Never let it be said he couldn't be solicitous.

[everymonstrousthing]

"Anything that needs me to bend my knee for any length of time isn't going to happen," says Kaz, and he's regretful, for a moment, because he likes all of those images, all of those ideas. "Could I stand for it? Take my weight on my good leg?" He leans in and, this time, it's him that takes the kiss, him that leans forward.

[materialnik]

There seems to be genuine disappointment there but Jesper smiles when Kaz is the one who makes a suggestion, who solicits affection in the kiss. It feels a little more mutual that way, a little less like convenience and use.

"We could do that," he says, mind already tumbling with the idea, the potential.

[everymonstrousthing]

"You can do whatever you want with me," says Kaz, surprised to find how deeply he means that. He takes another kiss. Jesper is just so warm and he finds himself yearning for it.

[materialnik]

"Dangerous offer you're making," Jesper says, as if he means to do anything but please Kaz. But first he wants to enjoy this, enjoy how Kaz wants to be kissed. It's painfully adolescent to delight in kissing like this but he doesn't care.

[everymonstrousthing]

Him and Inej would kiss like this, sometimes, just for the joy of it. Kaz is surprised by how easy it is. He brushes the very tips of his fingers along Jesper's jawline.

"Didn't I always trust you more than I should have?"

[materialnik]

"Do you?" Jesper asks, partly because he wants to hear Kaz say it again and partly because he can't believe that Kaz would. It doesn't matter that this Kaz didn't speak to Pekka, Jesper feels like he somehow knows.

But Kaz is also holding his face, if barely, and Jesper could just close his eyes and sink into it.

[everymonstrousthing]

"I do right now," says Kaz, which is as generous as he can be, as much as he's got to give. He strokes the side of Jesper's face lightly, pulling back just enough to see him.

[materialnik]

It's enough. Jesper decides it has to be enough. He kisses Kaz's mouth again. "Standing then. Over the end of the bed? If we even get that far. Back of the sofa might be as far as I get."

[everymonstrousthing]

"Wherever you want me," says Kaz, briefly and breathless. He smiles, just a flicker and leans up for another kiss. "Whatever you want."

[materialnik]

That smile could be the undoing of him and Jesper wants to see him smile again and again.

"Right here. We should do something very filthy on this couch so I can appreciate it whenever I lounge."

[everymonstrousthing]

Kaz raises his eyebrow, just a little, his mouth quirking with humour.

"What's your definition of filthy, Jes?"

[materialnik]

Jesper laughs and doesn't quite answer, more interested in playing with the buttons of Kaz's shirt. His own tastes might be too messy for someone like Kaz.

"Bend you over the arm of the sofa and have you," he suggests. "And whenever you sit here, you'll remember exactly why there are little snags in the fabric at the width of your fingers."

[everymonstrousthing]

Smirking a little, Kaz tilts his head. He nods.

"Sounds like something I might be persuaded into. What else?"

[materialnik]

He smiles then, a little more closed lipped as he leans back and looks Kaz in the eye. "Why would I give away all my thoughts, Kaz? I'm a better bluff than that."

He's not.

[everymonstrousthing]

"No," says Kaz, "You're not." He lies back a little against the arm of the sofa, unconsciously presenting himself. "And maybe I like hearing it?"

[materialnik]

Jesper tries to tell himself not to open his mouth and ruin a good thing but Kaz is laying there like something to eat up. "I'd want to be in your mouth," he says. "To come that way. In your mouth or...on your face. Your neck. Kissing up the taste of it after." It's hard to imagine Kaz finding that anything but distasteful.

[everymonstrousthing]

That gives Kaz pause for a moment. He hates being sticky, hates the feel of it against his skin. He's not sure how he'd cope with that - he's not sure whether it would be a step too far.

"We could try it," he says, a little wary, but not looking away. "I trust you." He means it.

[materialnik]

Well, Kaz had asked and had expected honesty. Jesper shrugs, noting the hesitation. "There's no reason that we have to try it now." Or at all. "We could make an arrangement of this."

But saints, every time Kaz says he trusts Jesper, his heart warms a bit.

[everymonstrousthing]

It makes a difference, he realises, that he's not quite drunk enough to be able to hide behind it. He looks up at Jesper, from his position half on his back.

"We could."

[materialnik]

He's not sure what answer he'd expected but Kaz surprises him anyway. Jesper smiles and trails his fingertips along Kaz's side. "Someone has to keep you entertained."

[everymonstrousthing]

"Saints only know what I'd do if I was left to my own devices," he says. A smile quirks the corner of his mouth. "Want to keep me occupied."

[materialnik]

"You do get very devious," Jesper says, relieved that his honesty has been easily covered in a veneer of flirtation, easier for everyone.

He returns to toying with Kaz's shirt buttons. "You're a little overdressed for entertainment though."