(no subject)

[everymonstrousthing]

Waiting while Inej finishes getting ready, Kaz checks his cuffs for, perhaps, the thirtieth time. The suit is new on, crisply tailored, deepest charcoal. He had endured a haircut and shave that afternoon. His boots have a mirror shine. He's made an effort which, while not dissimilar to how he looks every day, is enough that he's sure Inej will notice. His tie is navy blue, not a colour he'd normally choose but one that he knows Inej enjoys when he wears it.

So he's trying.
He's more than trying.

Comments

[everymonstrousthing]

"There's no weight to bear here," he says. "No reputation to maintain. We don't have to fight to survive." He shrugs, aware of just how much this might be to her. "No harm in trying. Does mean you'll have to help me figure out what we'll do with a Crow Club here."

[the_wraith]

The elevator dings and they're soon out in public again, on the street walking toward their destination, which Inej doesn't know.

"You know that's what I've always wanted," she says, finding his hand with hers. A future with the Dregs wasn't a real dream, just something that occasional tumbled through her mind when she tried to imagine where she was going, what she would do. But some honest work, for her, for Kaz? That's worth trying.

[everymonstrousthing]

"We could run a bar between us," he says. "No girls, no tables, nothing but drinking and dancing?" He glances down at her. "It's what I've been thinking about the last few days. Whether we could make that work."

He thinks between them, they could achieve most things. He thinks even the gods and the saints wouldn't have the balls to stop them.

[the_wraith]

"We could," Inej allows. She wonders if he would be content with that in the end, if Jesper would as she assumes he would also be brought in on the deal. It wouldn't make as much money as a casino, would require so much careful watching and planning.

"We could use that trick of yours, put people in the crowds at other bars. Convince them there's cheaper drinks and prettier people elsewhere."

[everymonstrousthing]

He smiles, pleased that she remembers those tricks, even though running the Crow Club had never been her job. He'd always had more useful things for her to do.

"Might work out," he says. "Stranger things have happened." He pauses, for just a moment, weighing up the next thing he had to say. "You're worth it, Inej. All of it."

[the_wraith]

After so long believing in the illusion that Kaz built up around himself in the Barrel, Inej has a hard time processing his words. Even now when she knows they're truth, when he showers her with affections and praise, he brings her up short with statements so simple, so honest, so immense that she doesn't know what to do with them.

No one's ever said these kinds of things to her before. How could she know what to say?

"You're worth it, Kaz," she says, the words bubbling up from who knows where. "You're better than the Barrel."

[everymonstrousthing]

He can't say anything to that for a moment. His cheeks flush warmly. He nods. The restaurant is up ahead of them, all warm lights and big windows. He squeezes her hand.

"Will we still call it the Crow Club? Even though neither of us are Dregs anymore."

[the_wraith]

She thinks about that, tucking her hair behind her ear. It's true that they're not Dregs, not really. She's never worn the tattoo and his is gone now. There's no Per Haskell, no debt at all, nothing to repay. Their little prison has given them that freedom.

But a part of her still wants to hold onto that connection. Kaz, Nina, Jesper. She got them all because of the Dregs.

"I think we should," she says. "It's like... in memory."

[everymonstrousthing]

"In memory," repeats Kaz, and then nods his head. They reach the restaurant and he takes his arm back so that he can open the door for her while holding onto his cane. "You're right. A Crow Club it is. The Two Crows club. Because it's the second?"

[the_wraith]

She flashes him a smile of thanks as he opens the door for her. Even when he was being a shit to her in the past, there was always something gentlemanly about Kaz. She likes it.

"I like it," she says. "Just have to tell Jesper the reasoning, so he doesn't think he's excluded."

[everymonstrousthing]

"He's not excluded. He can drink there all he likes." Kaz shrugs. "If he wants to lose all of his money, there are legal establishments here that are more than willing to take it off his hands."

[the_wraith]

"I meant in helping run the place." She tilts her head up at Kaz in curiosity. "Unless you don't?"

[everymonstrousthing]

"Unless I don't what, Wraith?" he asks, frowning. "Speak sense, Inej."

[the_wraith]

She takes a breath, refusing to rise to the barb. "I said Jesper shouldn't feel excluded, because I assumed you meant we'd run it like the Crow Club, you in command and Jesper and I helping with the rest. But you only said Jesper would be drinking and gambling, like you don't mean for him to be a part of the business end. So I said, I meant that Jesper should be helping with the business, unless you don't mean for Jesper to be helping with the business. Does that make sense now, Kaz?"

[everymonstrousthing]

"Oh. Perfect sense." Kaz hadn't meant to exclude Jesper, as it happened. It had been an uncharacteristic slip of the tongue; maybe he was getting too soft. He shrugs.

"Where else is he going to go?"

[the_wraith]

"That would be the question," Inej agrees. She smirks slightly. "He's a danger to himself when unsupervised. Idle hands are the Devil's playground."

[everymonstrousthing]

"Isn't that always what they say?" says Kaz, grinning. A girl offers to take his coat. He slips out of it without her assistance, then holds his hands out for Inej's. He takes the opportunity to drop a kiss into his hair.

[the_wraith]

It's so normal, it's bewildering. They are now the people they once watched, she once watched, enjoying their evening out at a nice place without a care in the world.

The hostess checks them in and leads them to a table. Inej takes in the restaurant as they walk, eyes gliding over everything. Kaz was right; she does like this place. It's simple in its elegance, the kind of posh that doesn't need to force itself on others. It's clean lines and rich fabrics and glimmers of silver. It's a lot like Kaz, actually.

"I don't think I've ever been somewhere this nice," she murmurs.

[everymonstrousthing]

"Me either," says Kaz, a smile twitching the side of his mouth as they get to the table and he pulls out the chair for her, waiting for her to take a seat. Once they're both sitting, he peels off his gloves and tucks them into his pocket. For a moment, he hesitates and then he offers her his hand.

"But this is who we are now, isn't it?" he says. "Away from Ketterdam. This is who we can make ourselves into."

[the_wraith]

He's always so courteous with her now; sometimes it feels even more telling, revealing, than when he takes off his gloves.

She smooths out her skirt and the tablecloth at her place, which was smooth to begin with.

"But we're always the same at the core," she says. "You think?"

[everymonstrousthing]

"I think so," he says, because he likes to think that about her, at least, even if he is rotten to his core. Even if he is ruined by what he become. She's better than him, he knows. She's made of rarer stuff. He picks up a menu and offers it to her. "Some things are too far gone to be fixed."

He's talking about himself, obviously. Never her.

[the_wraith]

She knows better than to believe that he's talking about anyone other than himself right now. Maybe he believes it of others -- not of her -- but he's made himself look a monster long enough that he doesn't see it any other way.

She takes the menu with a shrewd look. "I don't like broken things," she says, both casual and pointed, before dropping her gaze to the menu.

Inej wouldn't be here if she didn't think him capable.

[everymonstrousthing]

But that's the thing, isn't it? He doesn't feel broken when she looks at him. He doesn't feel monstrous when she sees him. He watches her for a moment, and then he smiles, glancing at his menu.

"Getting a taste for the finer things, Wraith?"

[the_wraith]

"Only that I can share with you," she replies without much thought. She went to parties, wrapped in silks, and the food and drink tasted like ash. The same things taste sweeter now.

"I'm sure you've scoped out this place before choosing it. What's good?"

[everymonstrousthing]

"The seafood is supposed to be excellent," he says, paging through his own menu. "But, admittedly, I mostly picked it because of the dessert menu." He glances up at her. "I've figured not out the way to your heart, Wraith."

[the_wraith]

She smirks at him, eyebrow raised.

"There's more to it than orange cakes," she teases, because he knows that. "You're going to get me fat, Brekker. I'll be an awful Wraith then."

[everymonstrousthing]

"Don't need a wraith here, anyway," says Kaz, definitely looking amused. "Just the girl I love and I'd love you no matter how round you got."