everymonstrousthing | (no subject)

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jesper

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It's late. It's very, very late. And he has no idea what he's doing. He has no idea what he's doing.

He's not drunk - a little, maybe, but not enough to actually blame it. He's been at the club all day, finishing repairing the damage that he'd wrought with his cane. He'd thought about going home, but his apartment doesn't feel like home anymore, because home was on the tenth floor, with windows that opened onto the roof.

And what he is is lonely. And he's found something for that - not a cure. But a distraction.

And maybe it isn't fair. But what about life is?

He knocks on Jesper's door and then leans against the wall and waits.

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Jesper lets his own hand fall away and gives control over to Kaz when the pressure changes. He's a quick study and Jesper just needs to be touched, needs just a little more.

He's fascinated by the rock of Jesper's hips, the catch of his breath, the slide of his cock in his hand. It's not dissimilar to picking a lock. There's a knack to it. A method.

He just needs Jesper to unlock.

"Kaz..." He can't actually remember what he wanted to say, only that it feels good. His body tips with warning and he knows he's totally at Kaz's mercy. Fumbling for another kiss, he pulls a little at Kaz's hair.

The pull in his hair is good and he nips back, Jesper's bottom lip as he squeezes, as he strokes, as he urges him on. He wants to hear his name said again. Like that.

The little bite shocks over his skin and Jesper gasps at the mixed pain and pleasure. "Kaz, that's–" Too late. He spills over, hot and slick over Kaz's fingers.

It's hot and slick and messy and Kaz's head spins with revulsion and desire both. He presses his face into the crook of Jesper's neck, just for a moment. For as long as he can stand.

Jesper groans and falls back into the mattress, letting his body crest, head spinning. "Saints, Kaz..."

He has to get up and wash his hands. He needs to. But he also doesn't want to leave Jesper in that moment. So he wars with himself a little.

He can see the tension in Kaz's face and knows he's pushed it too far. Jesper pulls back and raises Kaz's hand to his mouth, a silent offer.

Kaz's dark eyes widen slightly and he makes a soft noise. He nods, just barely, waiting to see what Jesper's going to do. He imagine, but that's not the same as seeing it happen.

He realises that his cock is hard. He squirms slightly.

He can feel it, the realization of just how much he's willing to do for Kaz. Ignoring the taste, Jesper sucks on one of Kaz's fingers, cheeks hollow and eyes downcast the way they were when he did this the first time earlier tonight.

Kaz watches, fascinated for a moment, his eyelashes fluttering at the sensation of Jesper's mouth sliding over his fingers. Little shockwaves of electricity go through him.

"Do you like that?"

"Teasing you? Every chance I get," Jesper says, kissing his palm.

There's a fond almost-smile on Kaz's face as Jesper kisses his palm like that. He swallows.

"I can live with that."

That smile makes his stomach flip and Jesper leans back, wiping his mouth off on the back of his hand. "Are you sure?"

"Sure that I can live with it?" he asks, watching Jesper settle. He ignores his cock. "I've lived with worse, Jes."

"Doesn't make me better," Jesper says. He glances significantly down at Kaz's cock. "Not going to do anything about that?"

Kaz glances down, his own cheeks colouring a little at the tone of Jesper's voice.

"Think I should?"

"Seems a shame to leave you neglected," Jesper says. "But I don't know if you want me to dirty my hands all over again."

This is a game, Kaz can see that, and he leans back against his pillows, eyebrow raised as he looks up at Jesper. The corner of his mouth twitches.

"What would you suggest?"

"I'd suggest you show me," Jesper says. "If you want to. How you like it?"

It's something that him and Inej had done when they were still edging their way close together. They'd sat at either end of the bed so that they were in each other's eyelines, or lain side by side, and then they'd touched themselves, looking each other in the eyes and, for a while, it had been enough. Still, there's something oddly vulnerable about it, about lying there and looking Jesper in the eye as he drops one hand and curls it around his cock.

Jesper stretches out on his side, close enough that Kaz can feel warmth radiate from him, but doesn't touch. He lets Kaz show him, already filing the image away for when this all inevitably goes south and Kaz gets tired of him. "What is it that's got you wound so tight tonight, hm?"

Kaz takes his time, teasing himself a little, keeping his touch light as he strokes his cock. He arches just a little.

"Nothing in particular. Same old shit."

"It's enough to keep you excited, still," Jesper says, indicating Kaz's erection. "Or maybe it's just my company."