AU - Rat

[everymonstrousthing]

In the days after she goes, he's Dirtyhands more often than not. He stalks Darrow, sharp enough to cut. So little soft left in him. It's worse, because he'd let himself soften. He'd let too much of Kaz Reitvald come back and now reminding himself how to be the man he was in Ketterdam is hard work. It hurts.

Still. There's rough work to be done. So here he is.

The air in the club is close with tobacco, the smell of bodies. Kaz's mouth makes a moue of distaste as he slips up to the bar and orders gin, neat. He leans his back against polished wood, looks up at the stage. He's in time to catch the tail end of the performance.

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[everymonstrousthing]

"I'd let you do it," says Kaz, absolutely certain in that moment, narrowed down to the press of Rat's cock into him. "If let you do anything you want."

[plaguedrat]

He opens his mouth, means to tell Kaz that he can't just say things like that when he's fucking him. What comes out is a tight, aching sound. He's going to come.

"Fuck," he says it as barely a word, more than an exhale as he crashes over, fingernails digging into Kaz's sides.

[everymonstrousthing]

The sensation of Rat coming inside him is heady and troubling and dizzying all at once. His entire body thrums with electrical energy. He's close but it's not enough - the friction of the sheets, Rat's cock buried inside him.

He whines, too needy to remember much of himself right then.

[plaguedrat]

Panting, legs still shaking a little, Rat takes the barest second to appreciate that sound, the way that Kaz voices his need. Kaz Brekker, so tightly wound and under control, and he's flying apart for him and with him. Rat stays where he is, hand slipping around to grasp Kaz's cock, moving along the length of it to coax him over.

[everymonstrousthing]

It isn't going to take long. Kaz lets himself give into it completely, lets himself rock and squirm against the stroke of Rat's hand. His breath whimpers out of him again.

"Please..."

[plaguedrat]

He nods, long haie spilling over his shoulder, brushing against Kaz's skin. He keeps himself close, puts all of his energy into staying upright and making Kaz feel good.

[everymonstrousthing]

He focuses on all of the different sensations - the brush of Rat's hair, his surprisingly strong hands, the warm weight of him. It's only a moment or two before he's falling, tumbling, losing himself completely.

It's too intense for him to even make a sound.

[plaguedrat]

When Kaz comes, it's a quiet thing, but Rat can feel it around his body and in his hand. He can feel the faint slump of Kaz's body, the quiet shift. Stroking him through it makes it clumsy to pull out but it gives him the freedom to move a little, to get a better look at Kaz's face when it happens.

[everymonstrousthing]

Mostly, what Kaz looks then, is young and soft, unguarded. He blinks, his eyelashes a dark smudge against his cheek.

"Fuck," he breathes, and then he turns, lifting his head to catch Rat's mouth in a kiss.

[plaguedrat]

He looks beautiful. They're both of them so old for their age, scarred and worn by a life stripped of safety and privilege. Now, they kiss and it feels like the whole world is a little lighter.

Rat hates himself when he realizes that he'll regret it when Kaz leaves. Stupid mistake.

He keeps kissing Kaz instead.

[everymonstrousthing]

Having just come, it's easy enough to keep it slow and languid, to lean up into the kiss, his fingers threading through Rat's long hair. He's just come, but he feels so far from spent.

[plaguedrat]

It's gotten longer since he arrived; he'd never bothered to do much with it unless it got in the way. Now, his hair pools beneath his head, an inky pillow. Leaning forward, Rat empties himself into that kiss. He cant think of anything after now. Everything that comes after, comes later, is more than he can currently bear.