everymonstrousthing | (no subject)

(no subject)

Kaz lets Jesper lead the way. It isn't the first time that he's been in Jesper's apartment but it's the first time without Inej, and that makes everything different. Once he's inside, he shrugs out of his jacket, leaves himself in his shirtsleeves, looks down at his gloves for a long, long time. Irritated, he passes one hand back through his hair and lowers himself down onto the couch.

"Not too late to turn me out onto the street, Jesper."

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

There's the faintest crease between Kaz's dark eyebrows, just the slightest hint of a frown. Trembling, he raises one hand, his fingers skimming, shaping the air over Jesper's bare shoulder, the back of his head. He barely, just barely, nods.

It's not much of a touch but from Kaz it's everything. His nod means even more and Jesper finally lets himself move, not nearly at the speed he'd like but smoothly, enraptured by him.

And, just like that, Jesper's fucking him. Kaz lets his head fall backs, lets himself get lost in it, for a moment. His fingertips brush Jesper's hair.

His hair's grown out some, enough that Kaz can grab on if he wants. Jesper even bends his head to it and shifts a little, raising Kaz's hips in his grasp.

Kaz does grasp at Jesper's wiry hair, looking for an anchor, letting Jesper shift him, giving in to it.

He'd forgotten how much he liked having his hair pulled, even only slightly. It lets him feel like Kaz is losing control and he never does that.

"You feel good," he says, the words coming out in a rushed breath. "Kaz, you...Saints."

Jesper's been waiting for this forever. Kaz knows that. He's been able to see it in his face for years.

"M'not going to break," he mumbles.

Jesper wants to ask if he's sure but he's also not stupid enough to push that boundary. He nods and lets himself have some of the speed, the intensity that he's wanted since this started.

And that's better. That's intensely better. Kaz groans, a soft and raw sound in the back of his throat. His good leg lifts again, wrapping around Jesper's thigh as they fuck. It's exactly what he needs. He feels wiped clean.

He wants to see Kaz like this again and again and this deep into it, this blissed out, Jesper can forget it likely won't happen. Kaz Brekker doesn't give up parts of himself easy but right now, Jesper can hear and feel him and the way that Kaz is both relaxed and tensed. It's fucking perfect.

He wants, he realises, something else. He needs to feel more anchored. He tugs Jesper's hair, turning his head so that he can kiss him, just a brush of lips.

Of all things, it's the little kiss that shocks him, and that Kaz initiates it. Jesper presses back into the kiss, enjoying the softness of it in the midst of all this.

It's something to hold onto, that kiss. It's a reminder that he isn't all ruined, which is something Inej found out first. Kaz makes a soft sound against Jesper's mouth.

"I like that," Jesper breathes between kisses. There's a little gentleness left in Kaz Brekker and Jesper gets to witness it, if only once.

"What do you like?" mumbles Kaz, his lips smudging against Jesper's with every syllable. He finds himself desperate to know.

"Kissing you," he confesses, forgetting any form of caution. "Never thought I'd get the chance." He shifts again, a hand trailing down Kaz's stomach, teasing at his cock.

Kaz huffs a sound that's half laugh, half moan against Jesper's mouth. His cock is more than half hard and the brush of Jesper's fingers is maddening. He doesn't know whether he wants him to slow down or go harder.

"Bet you pictured it enough."

He laughs, knows that he's caught. It doesn't surprise him that Kaz knows. "Ever since the day we met, but you knew that," he says, squeezing Kaz just a little.

His breath catches and he finds himself smiling, in the middle of it all.

He nods.

"I knew that."

"Of course you did."

Kaz smiling is better than a fat win at the tables because it's more rare and Jesper drops his head down to kiss him. He's got to enjoy the win while it lasts.

It's a good kiss, in Kaz's limited experience, and he pushes it deeper, craving it like a man needs oxygen to keep from sinking under the surface and drowning.

He whimpers a little and knows that Kaz will tease him when he remembers himself but Jesper doesn't care. This is the kind of kiss he's wanted from Kaz in a stupidly long time. When he moves again, it's harder, with less control.

The slightly sharper shift of Jesper's hips, his cock, presses a sharper sound out of Kaz, muffled against Jesper's mouth.

He's not in any doubt now. What Kaz feels is pleasure and Jesper is the source of it. It makes his whole body feel tight, needing to drive into him.

When Jesper finds his rhythm, it's harder, deeper than Kaz was expecting, and he feels like he's been pushed into cold water, like everything is sharp and new and clear. He can feel the pulsing heat of Jesper over him, inside him. He sobs out a breath.