(no subject)

He breaks into Jesper's apartment in the end. When Jesper doesn't answer the door, fingers of cold fear scrape down Kaz's spine. He has an image of Jesper beaten and broken. Dead. It's more than he can stand, and he breaks in, already preparing for all of the monstrous things that he might have to do.

But what he finds is worse. What he finds is an empty apartment, not just empty but vacant, and Jesper's pistols on a table. Jesper wouldn't go anywhere without his pistols. Jesper treats his pistols like a fucking limb.

There's a box under the bed that he's going to need to do something about, but he doesn't have the energy right now. Dirtyhands wouldn't worry about something like that. Dirtyhands wouldn't even stop.

Locking Jesper's door behind him, Kaz heads for the Crow Club. Rage slams through him and he turns, slamming his cane into the wall. But Grisha work is good, and there's no damage to the silver crow's skull at all. And, right then, Kaz wants to see something crumple. So he does the only thing he can.

He slams one gloved fist into the brick wall and feels pain explode.
It's good. It's better than what it replaces.